347 344. Dead.txt





 It was the result of years of experience.
 Because I was more skilled in assassination than anyone else, I knew how to counter assassination better than anyone else.
 A knee strike would not inhibit my honed 'swordsmanship'. Rather, it is the swoop and counterattack from that stance that is my true essence. I dare to show an opening and then counterattack the opponent unexpectedly.

 It was extremely natural.
 In the space of a breath, it was all over.
 I avoided the blade of blood that was approaching from the blind spot and generated the Sword of 'Magical Materialization' in my right hand while I was on my knees.
 And the cutting edge had pierced the heart of the 'Blood Doll' without an inch of error.

''Why, ......?''

 When I let out a stupid questioning voice, the pierced 'blood doll' stumbled backwards.

 I hurriedly deactivated my "magical materialization", but it was too late.
 The blood doll leaked blood from inside, as if a hole had been made in the glass of wine. It was losing blood just like a human, and at the end of its staggering, it slammed its back against the wall of the room.

 As I watch the Blood Puppet slyly stick to the wall and bend its knees, I realize what has happened.

 I had killed my benefactor who had gone out of his way to intervene in my life, but he had done the opposite.

 My body was moving on its own.
 Like that guy, I wasn't willing to die while uttering the words "I want to die"?
 No, I wanted to die for me. The situation is too different from when I was in Kanami.
 Then is it the power of the 'reversal' of the example? Was it the opposite of wanting to die, or has it become a force to be reckoned with, to live by? No, that would be the first thing that would resolve this worst mood.
 Other than that, was it the 'mommy ideal' that got in the way?
 I've already admitted that I'm a haze, so why?
 I don't know what's going on. I don't know what's going on anymore.

 I was thinking endlessly, alone, trying to come up with an answer by myself.
 But it wasn't, and then I heard the sound again.

 I felt the 'blood puppet' that had been pierced by my sword and was about to lose its shape laugh.
 And then the Noh mask of my face wriggles again.
 Its movements were short, simple, and concise, so I understood it immediately.

 He said to me - 'Strong' and 'I knew it, Ragne's swordsmanship is amazing'.

 I can recall the tone of his voice in my head.
 I once received the same compliment. The two of us traveled around the continent together, training knights and going around and occasionally having mock battles, and I heard the same words the first time I showed 'magic materialization' there.

''Riel-sama: .......''

 I shudder at the fact that he still says the same thing after all this.
 He was killed and turned into a blood monster, and I - who admitted to myself that I was a murderer with only an epidermis and a haze - still admire him. It was as unbearable as the horror of the raw.

'Well, that's ......, it's no surprise. ......

 I never thought it would be so painful to have him praise me for being strong. I squeeze out the words I can't find well, trying to tell him that I don't deserve the praise.

'Oh, how many years do you think it's been since then ......! I'm stronger now! Kill, kill, kill, kill, kill all sorts of people, including Master Rielle! I'm so much stronger now! Don't think of it the same way you did when you were a maid of honor! The same old Riel-sama, I can afford it!

 But that's not because Ragne Kaikwola is strong; it's just that time has passed.
 If only Rielle had lived with me ever since then, she would have been as strong as I was. I was going to say that, but the words that followed were different. In front of the 'blood doll' staring at me--

'Yes! I'm stronger than Master Riel! Quite frankly, the best in the world! I'm strong!

 For some reason, he was flaunting his power like an idiot.
 Hearing that, the 'blood puppet' moved its head and nodded.

 It was an insane word.
 To brag about being strong in front of Rielle, who sacrificed her strength, is too arrogant. I want to die of self-loathing. I'm in pain, I'm in agony.

 But I knew I had to do it.
 The magic of the 'light' and 'star' in my body - more than (...), Rielle's gaze in front of me spurs me on.

 And the Noh mask of the 'blood puppet' stirs.
 I follow it with my eyes and read it.

''-- You are, without a doubt, a wonderful woman. I believe that you are the best of all the handmaidens--

 The words I had heard in the past were repeated. 

 --At that moment, I felt as if my epidermis, which I had always hated, had been replaced (・・・・・・・).

 I may have been hallucinating again, but I felt a slight surge of strength.
 I used that power to move and try to stand up.
 The 'blood puppet' that is watching me also moves, letting go of the blood blade and pointing at the wall of the room.

 There were particles of light dancing there.
 To be precise, the blood that had adhered to the room had been converted into light.

 The light particles continued to be converted, filling the room to the brim.
 Then they moved softly and swooshingly and were sucked into the stairs leading to the roof.

 From the association, I assume that it is Nosfi-san's blood.
 The blood that Fafner would have prepared is not light.
 Probably some kind of big magic was activated on the rooftop. In conjunction with that, the blood that is part of her body seems to have turned into light.

''This is all ....... Nosfi-san's blood ......?''

 The whole room is glowing.
 I am appalled at the amount of blood.
 The amount of blood, which is not enough even after a hundred times of exsanguination, shows how seriously injured she is.
 I can also clearly see how much hurt and pain she had to go through to get up to this castle.

 I'm sure she must have suffered even more than I do now.
 Not only her body, but her mind must have been at the edge of shambles.
 And yet, she was--.

 A flutter.
 The sound of blood popped again.
 The 'blood doll', which is no longer just a torso, right arm and head, nodded.

 I know what that means to me.
 And yet, Riel still believes me to be 'the best'. It's a good thing that the same "stealer of reason", Mr. Nosfi-san, climbed up fifty floors, so it's a given that I'll be able to climb up too - even if I'm killed, I believe it.

 I thought they were harsh words that drove me away as I foolishly tried to die.
 But I know it's the opposite.
 These are kind words. Words that are too kind to help me.

 Even I can at least guess the conditions under which Fafner summoned The Blood Doll.
 Now Riel Kaikwola is helping me.
 She is helping me even in death.
 He is trying his best to help me, the daughter of the woman who killed him, who is probably the one who took away his value and family name and replaced him with his place in the family.

 So I stand up and answer to the 'blood puppet'.
 Swallowing the blood antithesis, I resume my performance and say 'What I want to tell Riel Kaikwola' that I've been holding in the pit of my stomach for a long time.

'Riel-sama, I understand ....... I'll go to the 'summit' of the Fuzzy Yards ....... No matter what kind of end it is, I will go ....... I won't stop, I will finish as I am. So, please see me off .......

 I got the 'ideal me (thing)' that I couldn't receive that day.

 However, it's too late.
 Rielle once asked me to go with her to Hoosiers, but I won't go with her anymore.

 So much for Rielle.
 Nevertheless, I told him positively that I was going to aim for the 'summit' of the Great Holy City.
 I also properly stretched my chest.

 The 'blood puppet' saw that and nodded widely at the end.
 I could tell that he was satisfied, satisfied, and relieved.

 Then he loses his form, like the 'stealer of reason' who has lost his 'untried'.
 He returns to blood.

''--Goodbye, Riel-sama.''

 I say a final goodbye.
 I just bow to the trail of blood and start walking.
 I open the door at the back of the 'Senate' room and walk up the stone stairs.

''Hah, hah, hah--!

 Somehow the body works.
 I know why.
 With my earlier question and answer, I am now the 'Ideal of Riel'.
 I'm in a state of moving after obtaining a new person's skin.

 The current me is a phenomenon that fulfills his desire, "--Lagne, find your new self in the great holy city," "I want Lagne to be Lagne," "I want Lagne to be Lagne," "I want Lagne to decide for himself. (Bolo).

 The parting lines were an act.
 Riel must have known that.
 But he was satisfied, satisfied, relieved, and gone.

 As I walked up the last flight of stairs, I thought about the meaning of that.
 The me now, the me that is me......? 
 At least, that's what Riel thought. Then this person's surface skin is his true self. Then, the weak self like a haze until just now is not me? No, it's not. That's my nature, and the 'chanting' of life proves it. Then which is it? One of them must be right and one of them must be wrong. I don't understand that: .......

 --it's too dark to know anything. 

 We need light to confirm this authenticity.
 I need light to illuminate the truth that is hidden in the dark.

 Yes, light.
 All you need is light.

 Light.
 Light, light, light, light.
 Light, light, light, light--

 What comes to mind is Nosfi-san's kind face.

 I no longer have only 'The One Who Steals the Reason for Light', Ms. Nosfi.
 I've never seen another life as brilliant as hers. A light that is many times more deserving than this scruffy me. Like Rielle, who knew about my performance and tried to help me. Someone who reached out to me, even if I killed him.

 He's a good man.
 I love him.
 I miss him.

 I want you to see that smile one last time.
 She's kind and bright and bright and dazzling and beautiful and loving, and I want her to teach me so many things.

 Mr. Nosfi.
 Mr. Nosfi, Mr. Nosfi, Mr. Nosfi, Mr. Nosfi.
 Mr. Nosfi, Mr. Nosfi, Mr. Nosfi, Mr. Nosfi, Mr. Nosfi, Mr. Nosfi, Mr. Nosfi, Mr. Nosfi, Mr. Nosfi, Mr. Nosfi--!

 With a single-minded desire to see the light, I move forward.
 Each time I call my name once, I go up one step and walk step by step to the roof.
 Then, after calling my name about fifty times, a strong light comes from the top of the stone stairs.

 It was supposed to be nighttime, but it was as bright as morning.
 Thanks to Mr. Nosfy, the 'top' must be shining brighter than ever.
 It dazzles these stony eyeballs.

 Oh, it's so bright ......!

'This, this light ......! This brightness: ......! Mr. Nosfy: ......! Mr. Nosfi, Mr. Nosfi, Mr. Nosfi, Mr. Nosfi: ......! Mr. Nosfy: ......!

 I walked out onto the blank rooftop and immediately called her name and searched for her.

 There's no obstacle in sight.
 The sky is filled with a light that I'm sure is hers.
 But soon I realize that Ms. Nosfi is not there.

 And the 'replacement' is a glowing - mama (...).
 The mama was waiting for me at the 'summit'.

 That mama moves her mouth and calls my name.

'Lagne (...) ......'

 Just the sight of him made my body tremble.
 Just like with Rielle, the tone of her past voice reverberated in my head.
 I don't even try to remember it, but it sticks around and won't leave me.

 It's a voice that compliments me.

 -- 'Great,' 'Well done,' 'You've done well,' 'That's my girl,' 'Lagne is a good girl,' 'You can be the best,' 'You're my daughter.'

 I can't stop shaking.
 My body starts to move on its own under the pressure of the waterfall obsession.
 If I don't become 'mom's ideal' right now, my mom will hate me. If I don't 'perform' more, I need to become the 'best' in the world, or I'll be discarded. No, she'll just pretend you weren't there.
 If mommy is in the mood, she can always pretend that Lagune is a daughter who never existed.

 So, I tried to abandon 'Riel's ideal' and become 'Mama's ideal' - and the 'bright light' blocked it.

''--aah (...)''

 The Bright Light shows me the truth that has been hidden in the dark all along.

 That mum over there now, she's not my mum.
 That's what I knew. She's not waiting for you at the top.
 She lied to me about being the first to see you.
 It was just words to make me feel better about being sold.

 The one in front of me now is not Mom, but Kanami.
 Just like me, she's a scumbag with nothing but an epidermis and a haze.
 A scum whose only function is to reproduce other people's "ideals".
 He's just acting.
 He's just standing there as my ideal mom.

 She's a lie.
 Her kind sounding voice is a lie.
 The hallucinations and auditory hallucinations that my mind produces--!

Ahh...

 That's the pawn the world has prepared to kill me with.
 A collector to make me pay the 'price' for the reason I stole it.
 If I don't have the power of the one who stole the reason of the dimension and kill my mom, who has become 'immortal', I'll be sent to the bottom again as the one who stole the reason.

 Oh, plain and simple.
 If I don't fight, I'm back in the mix.
 And, without a doubt, the mama in front of me is my 'number one' enemy in my life.

'Oh (...)!

 I acknowledge that this enemy is 'immortal' - that is, there is no more Mr. Nosfi.

 Mr. Nosfi has been killed and his life has been taken away from him.
 The light I wanted to shine on me was taken away by the one in front of me.

 A man with long, black, lustrous hair that flutters and smiles with a face that any member of the opposite s*x would love to see, and a glow that shines from the tips of his hair to the tips of his feet, a man of malice and charm.

 This person always had a kind face, gave me all the convenient pet theory, and stole what was mine in a stinky way. Everything I had that was worth having, he made it his own.

 I always felt that there was something wrong with that.
 It was absolutely strange that such a thing was the way a mother and daughter should be.
 Pretending to be someone else, except once a month, is not something a family should do.

 I had always thought so.
 That's what I 'dare' to do, and now I finally shout it out.

'Yo, how dare you ......! How dare you! You killed Mr. Nosfi! I always do! You always do! All my favorite people! You're just taking what's important to you! Ever! From the house! No, ever since I was in that cabin! Take it away from your children! Doesn't that conscience hurt! Don't you feel ashamed to be alive! You are aaaaaa--!!!!

 I shake my throat so hard my flesh tears, and I scream with the intention of floating veins in my neck and letting my stomach juices flow.
 It just doesn't make sense (・・・・・).
 There's no mommy to hear it on this 'summit', and no Mr. Nosfi who wanted it to happen. Everything is already too slow. I'm always, always slow.

'It's you, Mr. Nosfi! That was number one! Without a doubt, of the three of us - yay, it was the 'most' valuable life in the world! By all accounts, Mr. Nosfi should have been the one to survive! How dare you take that Mr. Nosfi's life! How dare you take it from me!
'Yeah, yeah ....... You're right, Lagne. You're right. You're the right guy. I've been right all along.

 The mom in front of me - no, Kanami agrees.
 As long as we were 'close friends', it was natural for us to agree on something equally slow.
 And the words that follow are the same as my wish.

'...... Lagne, let's have a rematch.'

 First and foremost, we decided to fight each other as enemies.
 It was a very quick conversation because we were able to see into each other's hearts and minds.

'If you want the Nosfies too, then fight me. Fight me and take it from me.

 Kanami walked across the rooftop to where the two swords were stuck.
 It was there that the 'Treasured Sword of the House of Alais, Rowen' and the 'Heart of Helmina' pierced through both of Nosfi-san's arms.
 Kanami pulled out only one of them, Rowen-san, and took a few steps back.

''Which one is the real 'best' ....... We'll decide here, now. But there will be no do-overs. We've fought many times before, but this is the last time. There will be no more, I swear to the soul of Nosfy.

 I dare to leave one for me.
 Then Kanami curtsied like a knight and pointed the tip of his sword at me.

'My name is Aikawa Uzumi. I challenge the knight Ragne Kaikwola to a duel for the Nosfi. This is a battle for your favorite life. --Let's see if you can't fight.

 He said everything I wanted to say before I did.
 Furthermore, Kanami spouted a line that was exactly like mine when I first met her.

 Maybe that's why I feel like the person in front of me now is not my mom or Kanami, but myself.
 An unprecedented wariness flows out of me and I walk towards 'Helmina's Heart'.

'Nosfi-san is mine! Don't think you can beat me at Killing Each Other! Mr. Nosfi's "Immortality" will not be given only to scum like you: ......! Mr. Nosfi's light is the only light I have: ......!

 By drawing his sword, he showed that he had received a duel.
 At that moment, the rooftop, which was just as bright as it was, shone even brighter.
 The brightest light of the day filled the room, as if to push me back.

 --light.

 Light.
 A bright light.
 A familiar light.

 --Mr. Nosfi looking at me?

 I looked up at the sky above and searched for her.
 Of course, there was no one there. There is only light.
 But to that light I cry out.

'...... I swear! That's all you need to know! This is where, this is where, this fight is my 'best'! Now my 'dream' is over!

 I responded a little late with an answer that I'm sure Mr. Nosfi would have liked to hear.

 Of course, this doesn't make sense either (・・・・・・・・).
 If I make up my mind now, it's too late for anything else.

 Nevertheless, I have now decided in the light (here).
 I decided [I wanted to defeat my 'number one' enemy].

 There is no reason for it. There is no meaning, or even value.
 Because there is no opponent here that I really want to attack.

 But I decided to fight.
 I can't stand to kill the first enemy (scum) in front of me, so I'm going to fight.
 And then I will end my dream!

 This enemy (scum) sacrificed Mr. Nosfi's life and took away the value of his life.
 You're a scumbag who uses your children to make yourself feel all shiny and strong.
 You're the only one I can ever forgive.
 There's no way I'll ever forgive you!

 The enemy's name is Kanami.
 She appears to be an oddly aged woman, but that's a skill '? It is only my 'ideal' due to the effects of It's a cowardly skill that makes you bond with affection, but now-- exposed to Nosfi-san's light, I can see its true form!

 A dark-haired, dark-eyed man with lilac magic, "Gentile".
 A thousand years ago, "The Founder", who was raised and nurtured with every "ideal" mask on.

 Now I'm going to reassemble the tactics for Kanami.
 I've used up all my moves against the Kanami, but there are some things that remain in place.

 I still have the swordsmanship and magical materialization that I honed with Rielle.
 It was my innate talent to be able to transform the magic power that I had solidified into a transformative force.
 I'll use my magic power as a sword, a shield, an arrow, and a string to cut you down head-on (・・・・・).

 That's my original and ideal way of fighting.
 I don't care what my mother taught me anymore.

 --When I thought that, I felt my bangs swaying softly.

 Suddenly my senses are clear and I feel as if my body and mind are one.
 Thanks to the surrounding light, I can often see the flow of magic power. No, it's not just magic power. I can feel the [reason of the world], like the flow of things, with my skin.

 In line with my change, the Kanami in front of me begins to solemnly preface the duel.

''Ah. Well come, challenger Ragne. I'm sorry to be an ...... substitute, but I'll let you begin the 'trial'.

 No.
 I'm the one who's going to try "The Trial" but it's me (you) ......!
 I (you) will continue to impeach this me until I (you) also admit my true self: ......!


"-- Here (...), the (・・・・・) 'summit (...)' of this world is the 60th layer (・・・・・・). It's the hierarchy of "The One Who Steals the Reason of Light" nosfies. It's not steep, and indeed this is the 'highest' and brightest place in the world. Lagné, let's make sure it's under this white light. Expose everything about you: ......! That's what she left behind in The Sixty-Third Trial: ......!


 No, you can't be--! 
 You don't have to tell me, I know!
 It doesn't matter, Mr. Nosfi! It's Mr. Nosfi!
 Please, watch me (Kanami) for my true nature there! And you'll regret it!

"Lagne! Let's get on with it! Our trifecta is confirmed here and now!
"--Kanami! That third verse will kill you! I will kill you for sure!

 In this battle I will prove it!
 It wasn't Kanami or me who should have survived, it was you!
 The one who was 'best' in the world was you, no one else!
 Mr. Nosfi!

 That's what I wanted to tell her.

 Me and Kanami.
 We both ran out of this 'world of bright lights' at the same time in front of the mirror.