I sat down on the cobblestone floor.
　As she sat there with her soft body, I could see the winner clearly when I looked up.
　The lower you look up, the better the spectacle.

　The walls surrounding the world were filled with spectators.

　The cheers were loud.

　They were praising the winner, Futa.


　Finally, I realize my defeat.


　It's not the first time I've faced Futa like this and lost.
　That's normal.
　I've lost many times before, which is why I was looking forward to this day.

　So why...

".......

　My vision is slowly distorting.


　I don't know why this one loss is so heavy.

　There were many things I wanted to say.

　The feeling of not wanting to admit defeat honestly.
　I wanted to try again.
　I don't want it to end like this.

　The feeling that this arena that I hosted is no longer my own.

　In my heart, I knew.
　The spectacle I worked so hard to create. The fight I've been waiting for with you.
　I didn't expect to get it this time like I said I would.
　I did the best I could. I played all the cards I could think of.
　And then I lost. I had no reason to feel like I was being overwhelmed by frustration, even if I admired it.

"......... .........

　My mind is out of control.
　The calm part of my brain kept repeating to me to calm down.
　The cooler part of my brain kept telling me to calm down, but my fevered heart wouldn't respond to a simple ice pack.

　--If we don't do something, she'll take the Spectacle.

　--Richter already has a new pawn in his hand.

　--It's getting out of my control.


　But all of them can be quickly recovered later.
　That's how I've made my arrangements.
　So for now, I should congratulate Futa on his good fight and smile at him.

　Just act like you always do.

　Even though I know that.

"......

　I can't speak.
　I can't see.

　So much.

　So much.

　"Is defeat so bitter?

　My head hurts like a crack from the first time I've felt it.

　Why?

　Why?

　I don't know. It's hard. I wipe my eyes.
　My vision is distorted again by the sight that jumps into my clear vision.

　I wipe the new wound over and over until the blood stops.
　My ridiculous tear glands overflowed no matter how hard I tried to suppress them.


　Every time the world becomes clearer.

　In the venue of victory, you don't respond to the audience.
　You were smiling at someone, as if you had won a victory together.

　I couldn't help but miss that.


...... "Huh.


　It was a good fight.
　My throat was so constricted that I couldn't even formulate the word.

　The lower half of my body was so weak that I felt as if I had lost my back.

　Shameful, shameful, shameful.
　I can't forgive myself for exposing myself like this in front of the public.

　And yet...

"Lilac-sama!

　A shadow appeared in front of me as I sobbed like a child.
　I didn't want to simply take the hand that was gently extended to me.

　I didn't want to ask her to take my hand and stand up at the end of this abomination.

　And to the last person I wanted to be seen with.

　Oh. Then I wish you hadn't seen me.
　You think about it, and then you realize. I realize...


　If it's me you're looking at then...


　Just like at the handfasting.
　If you'd been watching me the whole time.

　I wouldn't have felt this way.


"...... Why?


　The words I managed to squeeze out were incomprehensible.
　The young man in front of me tilted his head as if in trouble, but still reached out his hand.


Why ...... are you in so much pain?


"That's...

　Futa was at a loss for words as he thought for a moment.
　Then he shook his head loosely.

...... I don't know.

　I'm not sure what to say.
　She saw his usual gentle expression in his eyes.
　He looked around at the still enthusiastic crowd and said.

I've rarely lost a game. And I've never been cheered so loudly. It would be arrogant of me to say that I understand Lilac's feelings.
"......
But I could tell that Mr. Lilac was very committed to ...... this match. It's frustrating that it didn't work out. I think I understand that feeling.
"...... frustrating.
Yes.

　He nodded, narrowed his eyes and muttered.

He nodded, narrowed his eyes and muttered, "I know it's a bit presumptuous of me to compare. I'm not sure if it's fair to compare me to you, but I've seen the frustration and sadness when something you thought might work out doesn't work out. Sadness. The feeling of being disgusted with yourself. I think I understand those feelings very well.

　I thought it was going to work.
　I thought it wasn't supposed to be like this.
　I was sad.
　I hated myself.

　One by one, Lilac thought back and closed her eyes.
　She wiped a drop from her eye and exhaled.

　The sword you and I will make together.

　That's how today's excitement was supposed to be made.
　It wasn't supposed to be like this. Lilac knows how this cheer was made.
　It was sad. Things had been going according to plan. I didn't think Futa would turn it around.
　Oh, I see. I hate myself.

　As a warrior, I want to beat you.
　But I'm looking for something else.

　"Even going into the fight, those two feelings were mixed up.

　--So I was the one who was not prepared for the game.

...... You wanted to win.
Yes.
...... And...

　I wanted to have a fun game with you.

　In the end, that's all I wanted.
　Takehito's desire to take the championship from Futa.
　And I wanted to make the world a better place with you.

　I wanted to take them both in my hands.

　"I knew this would happen, so I did everything I could.
　But... But nothing.

I wanted to make my ...... dream come true.
I know. That's why I'm .......
Yes. You put him there.

　I wish I could say to myself at the time that it was all a mistake.
　We opened each other up more than I thought we would.

　Oh, so stupid.

　There's only one thing I didn't expect.



　"I never thought she'd be this open to people. "



　You have every right to be disgusted.
　Because this is the card you've been playing to set her up.
　It was only because I cared for Futa more than she did that things went smoothly at that time.

　And now I find myself in an unexpected situation in the exact same way.

　That's my blood sister.
　It's so bad, it makes me want to throw up.

"...... didn't work, did it?
What?

　Futa rolled his eyes as he muttered to himself.
　Lilac wiped away her tears for the umpteenth time and continued.

I should never have given you that girl.
"Haha!

　Laughing, Futa shook his head.

"Indeed. He's been a really good partner in winning.

　I wanted to tell him that wasn't true. But I couldn't say it.
　Lilac smiled weakly, but she didn't have the energy to do anything about it.



...... Yes, Master Lilac.

　So I looked up defenselessly at Futa's words, which I suddenly remembered .

"Because I won. Can I ask you one thing?

　If Futa loses, I'll 'get rid' of her.
　Futa took the offer. And he won. Completely and utterly.

　So, the proposal.
　Lilac gulped as he continued.


　One way or another.

　The First Martial Arts Tournament in commemoration of the construction of the Eisenhart arena Spectacula.
　Today is the second day of the finals.

　Today, the second day of the finals, ended in a climax of excitement.











　--The spectacle hall was bathed in the setting sun.

　The sun was shining on the spectacle.
　The spectacle club was quiet once the game was over and the crowd had cleared out.

　After all the people have gone home by the staff's guidance.
　The battlefield is empty, and the spectator seats are bare like mortar.
　Without the filter of people, the venue would be so inorganic.

　That's what the girl was thinking.

　Leaning her arm on the parapet and resting her cheek against the railing, she gazed at the scenery.
　The way the red of the sunset drew a beautiful curtain of light was quite beautiful, and it was no wonder that her sister was so particular about the design of the exterior walls.

　However, considering the fact that this can only be seen at this time of the day when there are no spectators, I can see why.
　The corner of my mouth twisted as I realized once again that I am a woman with a very bad character, or rather, a woman who is possessive about everything.

But...

　I'll take my chances. This is how I have time to look at the scenery alone. I guess I'm a lucky man to be able to stare at this spectacle they've created.

......

　Rewarder. I've never thought of myself that way.

　I was never born decent. I couldn't live a decent life.
　I've been kicking and screaming and losing my way to this point.

　But...



"...... won, right?



　I still don't feel it.
　But in a spectacle filled with cheers.
　But in the midst of the cheering spectacle, when we looked into each other's eyes with a sense of accomplishment, the powerful and pleasant feeling that filled my body was something I had never experienced before.

　If you call it victory, then yes.

　It was only natural that I didn't understand this feeling.

　I'd won something. The rush of emotion in that moment was something I'd never experienced before.

　And when I think back on it, I can't help but hug myself.
　A sweet heat, similar to a pleasant sensation, ran down my spine.

　The fresh feeling of just a few moments ago came back to me.
　I was happy, happy.
　I couldn't help but feel happy and comfortable.

　If you call it victory...

　Oh, definitely, I am. For the first time in my life, I won.


"Yeah, ......!


　I did it, I did it.
　I don't know if I've ever been so happy in my life.

　I buried my face in the railing and flailed my feet.
　I'm like a child looking for an outlet for my emotions and trying to vent them from one end to the other.

　But it can't be helped. It's the first time.

　Like a child, that is, the freshness of being confused by something new.
　It's the first time you've had something that every adult has had--that's good.

　You can see the red cheeks, the eyes are tightly closed, the corner of the eye is still down, and the smile that can not be hidden is obvious even if you can not see the mouth.

　In the event that you have any kind of questions regarding where and how to use the internet, you can call us at the web site.

"I did it. ......

　It's not that the heat has cooled down.
　It's not that the fever has cooled down, but the emotions that have slowly seeped into your body, and while your thoughts are still running properly, your thoughts are embracing you passionately.

　I've done it.
　For the first time, I had won.
　I'm not going to dedicate that victory to anyone.
　But you still want to tell someone.

　There's no one left in this world to tell. And yet, if by muttering it, the wind can carry it to you...

　I raise my face, my vision moistening, and think about the setting sky.

　Ah.

　Tears of joy really do exist.


There you are.
"Screech!
Squeal?
Whose is it? ！！！！

　Suddenly, a voice behind me.

　I turned around and rubbed my eyelids and stared at the young man who was so big but had no sign of me at all. He did not touch the still red eyes, however.



You were looking for me?
Yeah. It's the other way around.
...... I don't want to remember too much.

　It was only a few days ago, though.
　I remember that I came looking for Futa in the spectacle of the setting sun.
　After that, I had to be chased, so I could understand the bitter look on his face.

"Right.
"Yes.

　The silence is not awkward.
　She crossed her arms and hooked the railing. A large hand was placed next to hers.

　She kept her arms buried to hide her slightly heated face. Glancing to the side, you see a profile with a rather refreshing smile on it.

"......
What?
Nothing.

　There's more to see than this.
　There are better things to look at than this face, like a spectacle sunset.
　I'm not sure what you're talking about.

You won.
"...... won, right?
You're right. I'd be lying if I didn't.
Yeah.

　Now the wind blew through.
　My hair isn't long enough to blow, but...

I don't feel it.
You don't?　I've got a lot of ....... Why are you so cool about it?
It's the age difference, right?
At least make it a deceptive lie.

　I'm not sure what to say, but I'm going to say it.
　Futa looked at her in disgust.

　He wondered if she was really happy to see him.
　She seemed so calm that he wondered if he was just spinning his wheels.

　She says it doesn't feel real. It was also strange that she seemed to accept her victory.

"I'm... I'm grateful. Blessed. Happy. Happy. I've felt many firsts since I came to King's Landing. I've never felt so happy. To be honest, my hands are still shaking.

　There was no need to go through the process of remembering.
　A voice calling out to me, like the rumbling of the earth in my chest. The heat you can feel on your skin. And then.

　The smile that I saw from the corner of my eye.

"Hmm.

　With an absent minded reply, she looked at Futa's hand holding the railing.
　Sure enough, it was trembling slightly.

It was good.
"It was good, but... Oh, that's your reaction?　Am I reporting to you?　Isn't that right?　I'm here to share more.
"Sharing, huh?

　With one of her crossed arms gently resting on her cheek, she let out a sigh.

　I'm sure you're not the only one.

You've got it all wrong, haven't you?
"What?

　What's with this little girl?
　The final is tomorrow," she said, pointing her finger at Futa.

The final is tomorrow.
"............
"............

　A moment of silence.
　It was Futa's stammering moan that broke the silence.

"...... No.
"What?
...... You're right, but...

　It's a good idea to have a good idea of what you're doing.

　It's rare to be able to see beyond the head, she thought.
　She was distracting herself by thinking about unnecessary things.

"I don't get it .......

　I've worked so hard for my first victory.


　We did everything we could together. You gave me a thumbs up.
　There's so much I want to say.

　But there was no response to his moans.

　I felt a thump on my head.

The victory party is tomorrow night. Don't let your guard down until then.
So why are you so calm?
It's the age difference, isn't it?
You like that phrase?

　She spins around and turns away.
　One step, two steps toward the exit.

　I was looking for her to come home with me, but she turns on her heels first.
　I followed her in disgust. I don't want you to get in trouble on the way home.

It's not that I like her. It's just a fact.

　There's no such thing as age difference, of course.
　Same. Same first win.
　My heart would have died of shame in a lot of ways if I'd seen what I'd just seen, but apparently that's not a possibility.

　The difference in age, I should say, is just right.

"You're younger than me.
"Not much older. At least not at heart.
Who's nine?
I'm not nine years old!

　I mean...
　Because I've had to make myself look a lot younger.
　You have to say it all the time to imprint it in your deep consciousness.
　Age does not change.
　Whatever that means, it doesn't matter now.

　See you tomorrow for the victory party.

"Hooter.
What the hell. d*mn, I thought it was gonna be more like, yay!　I thought this would be more exciting.
I'm not that kid. I'm not that kid.
Me neither. ？？？？
You're talking out of your ass.




　I'll keep my smoldering thoughts to myself.
　I'm not that kind of sentimental girl.
　I want to be the bad guy who doesn't even get excited about winning.


　Otherwise, he'll care.


　You're the only one who gets emotional.

　Because tomorrow will be the last time I say these words.



　Cross your hands behind your back.
　Half-turn around and smile.



"Let's go home.


　The reply, "Oh," is devoid of any emotion.
　And that's okay.