128-005 Number one? My brother will pass....




Since I started attending junior college, I have often felt that my life is in danger.
It is not a cinematic development that I am being targeted because of my professionalism, but simply because my girlfriend suspects me of cheating on her. I don't want to be an enemy of all women in the world, so I will explain myself here. I am not cheating on her. I'm dating the best woman in the world. Yes, I'm dating the best woman in the world.
I've said things like that before to make her stop doubting me.

Hmm.

In her apron, she only showed that thin reaction and silently cut vegetables with a knife without a glance at me. I thought that she had not understood me at all and wondered how I could clear up the misunderstanding, but I gave up that idea when I saw the dish she had prepared for me. The carrots and radishes were so unevenly sized that it looked like a structure blown up with dynamite. She was properly upset. Too cute .......
One day, I was thinking that I don't give a d*mn about people's love life, but one day an incident happened.
I was on a date with Alina at my favorite coffee shop.

She asked me, "Where were you looking?
'What? I was just looking at that lighting, thinking it was stylish.'
'Liar. You definitely saw the waiter earlier.

The waitress I mentioned was the woman who helped me when I placed my order. I don't think I was aware of it.

I don't think I was aware of it. That waitress had big breasts, didn't she?

Yes? Sure, she had the fullness of an Ibaraki melon, and her pheromones were great, but I didn't see them. I didn't see it.

'Alina is no slouch either.
'I'm not happy to be compared to something so vile.'

That's ...... vulgar. ......! You've got to be kidding me. That's the perfect edition every boy dreams of, filled to the brim with dreams, hopes, and friendships. I don't know anything about that. You've turned hundreds of millions of the world's youth against you, boy. Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no. I'll tell my big friends.
But I'm gonna protect you.
Even if it means turning the world against you. Snap.

Your smug face is getting on my nerves lately.
'Shut up. A man has to look good once in his life.
If that's the case, you should only do it in front of me. If you show it to other women, I wonder what will happen to .......'
'Yandere koeko ......'

I've been promoted from tsundere to yandere (?). I wonder what she will be like ten years from now. Anything is fine as long as it doesn't go in a sadistic direction, but please don't make an enemy of the world. Another woman, another female, or whatever she's been calling herself lately, any woman that I might have anything to do with. I know it's a joke. I just hope she won't do me any harm.

Speaking of which...

Alina held up her long, slender index finger. In high school, it would have been her middle finger. I remember holding that middle finger firmly because the image was too indecent to broadcast. I think I got slapped or punched. It was a long time ago.

'I wonder if Ugin-chan is dating.
''What?''

Ugin went out with you? That's not true.

That's not true.
'Why not?
'I've been trained to ask permission when I'm going out with someone. I don't go out with anyone without permission.
You're sick.
'I'm not sick. Bokyu, I'm healthy.
'Which child actor are you imitating? It's disgusting, stop it.'

Haha, I can't do this at all.
Ugin dating a bipedal protein is unrealistic. Can you imagine such a scene? ....... Big brother is ...... hiccup ...... health of his sister more than anyone else ...... ugh .......

'...... honey. Where's the info?'
'A photo posted by Ugin-chan'.
'Let me see it, honey.
'I'll show it to you, but you'll have to call me something else.'
'No, honey. You call me darling, too.'
'......Wow, okay, darling......'
'Wow, you're too westernized, darling. Please stop it, it's embarrassing.'
'......Korosu.'

He showed me his phone while telegraphing.
She covered her face with her hands and knocked me down, but I left her alone and looked at the picture.
The background is a beach somewhere. Ugin in a bathing suit. Some girls who looked like her friends. A male Homo sapiens is reflected in the picture.
Who is this bipedal protein?
Who is this skin-colored life form that is so familiarly rubbing shoulders with Ugin?
Who is this solid creature wearing only a pair of shorts touching the Sakakimagi girl?

I heard a voice in my head.

Get rid of it!
Get rid of it!

There was a faint smell of gunpowder smoke. This is it, the memory of that hotel room.
Each time I squeezed the trigger, one shot after another, a hole appeared in the wooden door. Many rays of light leaked through the holes and shined on me.


Why, he asks, coughing. He struggles to keep the blood in his throat from entering his lungs.
You knew what would happen if you betrayed the homecoming club. I muttered to myself. He smiled, showing his reddened teeth as if he knew his fate.
'The gun--it's like justice. Always going in a straight line. Do you think our justice ever looks back?
I can't answer that.
Since that day, I have never been able to touch a gun. That hunk of steel looked like the devil in angel's wings.

Alina.
'Hey, what's up, darlin'?
'Orders have been given.'
'Orders? ...... Oh, you're talking about the setting of the homecoming club.'
'Investigate organisms approaching Ugin and eliminate them if necessary. And don't call it a setting. It makes me sad.
'What if Ugin-chan likes him? Are you going to break up with her?
'Depends.
'Leave him alone, he's a grown man. Focus on your date with me.
'Okay, honey. You're still the best in the world today.
'Oh, no, that word's gonna melt me.

It's been a long time since I've been on a mission.
I'm going to show you that being a former homecoming club member isn't all it's cracked up to be.




The first thing I did was talk to Ugin.
Ugin is now a third-year university student and lives on campus in another prefecture, so it is difficult to get in touch with him. So, I gather information and formulate a hypothesis during the conversation. I will directly ask him, 'Did you make a man? But since it is likely to cause a rift in the relationship between siblings, let's keep it civil.
He carefully typed in Ugin's phone number, which he had obtained by paying a detective 700,000 yen.

Yes, this is Sakakiki.
'It's me. It's my brother.
Wow, you're as creepy as ever. Long time no see.
'I was just wondering how you're doing. Are you enjoying college?'
Yes, it's fun. Are things going well with you and Alina, brother? Don't tell me you guys broke up or something?"
'Don't worry, I'm so in love with you that you'd be a donkey.'
Oh, that's nice. When are you going to propose?
'When this war is over.
You'd better get out of that kind of thing."

My brother is sad. I wonder if he has come to know reality as a college student. He should enjoy fiction a little more. Lack of creativity is the first step to becoming a boring person.
I casually played the game.

'Are you seeing anyone, Ugin?
No, I don't.

You're lying. My sweet little sister would never be left alone.
I'm sure she'd say, 'Oh, I don't want big brother to know! I can't say it's because I look like my brother! I bet you are blushing and screaming in your heart. By the way, if I were in a real relationship with someone who looked like me, I would do everything in my power to break it off. Ugin's life would be ruined. The worst thing you can do is to date a freak like me. It is written in the Six Laws of Life.

Ho. Lying is not good. It's true that humans build a balanced society with lies. But not between siblings.
I'm not really here. Even if I was, I wouldn't tell you.
'Hey. I told you I need your permission to go out with you.
I've never heard of it.

I've never heard that either.

Oh, yeah. I'm going home. I'll let you know.
'Okay. And I don't live at home.
'Really? Living with Alina? Oh, no.
I don't live with you.

He came at me one way and I denied it, even though it was like living together half the time.
After that, he asked Ugin when he would be back, and we hung up the call. That's when we settled the matter. Wait and see, Ugin's homo sapiens. Your life is short. Make sure you delete all the data from your hard drive.

Two weeks later.
I went home for the first time in a long time. I really like the feeling of security at home. There's nothing to be afraid of.
Ugin had not returned yet. I told Mommy that I hadn't seen Ugin's face for a long time. She had no idea that her daughter might be dating an android of unknown origin. Maybe I'd have a woman's intuition.
I went to the living room, drank some water, and waited. Sometimes I reply to Alina, shivering as I await the arrival of Ugin Sakakiki, the Sakakiki family's masterpiece of humanoid weaponry.
An hour later, the front door opened without warning.
I have my gun, I have enough ammunition, my vest is ready, the knife on my waist is ready, all I have to do is to be prepared....
I got up and headed for the front door.



I'm home.

My sister's familiar voice. I welcomed her with open arms.

'Welcome home, my sister.
'Yeah, no hugging.

Ugin's hair had not changed; it was still wavy in a forehead-baring bob. She still has the look of a Hollywood actress. When will you appear next?

'You haven't changed at all. I'm relieved.
'I am constant. I will continue to shine beautifully like a metal that never rusts.
'My brother's brilliance is not in demand.

You've got it, Alina. I said something cool.
I was in a good mood after the emotional reunion, but the mood was ruined when Ugin started drinking beer in the living room. The image of the innocent younger sister was shattered. Are you one of those so-called "Parisians"? Nothing wrong with that, but my image of .......

'You don't drink?'
'No, not now.'
'Well, I'll have a drink.

With a plop, Ugin gulped down the fizzy drink. Sister Ugin continued to drink, emptying four 500ml cans. I chugged water while shivering and shuddering at the sight of my pretty little sister reeking of alcohol beside me. I felt sorry for my sister's liver. I can hear it screaming. Stop, don't pour alcohol on me. Those of us who have suffered from acid rain know the feeling. But the rain is not forever. Until then, endure.
Mr. Ugin is finally flushed and becoming more conscious. His upper body has been swaying slightly from side to side since a few minutes ago, so it seems that he is ready. Thinking it was now or never, I decided to ask him.

Mr. Ugin!
'Ai'.
'Are you enjoying campus life?'
'Of course it's fun.'
'Heh.'

The sister who glared at me.
Even Alina, who was at the height of her tongue, did not take this tone. I wonder if she has a bad drinking habit. But don't be afraid of this. She's still cute.

'Oh, yeah. It's fun, isn't it?
'Huh. I was surprised to see your personality change.
''Oh?''
'Heh.'
'That's why I'm lying. Gghhhh.'
'Ugin-kun. Are you dating a man?'
'Oh, you're talking about that again? I told you, I'm not here.
'Don't lie in front of your brother.'
''Huh?''
'Heh.'

That's a tough one.
I wonder if this girl thinks she can beat the ex-homecoming member by intimidating him. It may work in the natural world, but in the human world, it only exposes your pettiness. The end of a man who has given up words and stopped thinking is always miserable. They are like collared mad dogs.
I pulled out my phone and called Alina.

Yes, this is Hiwa.
'It's me, honey. Send me the picture.'
What's that?"
'It's the special nude picture of Ugin that you showed me two weeks ago.

As soon as I said that, he said, 'Hey! Ugin head-butted me. Brain stem damage, hemorrhaging in the frontal lobe, ruptured eyeballs, a half-destroyed hippocampus, and 2.3 billion dead nerve cells.

'Hey, that sounded really loud just now. ......
'No problem. Can you send it anyway?'
Yeah, ...... got it. I gotta go.

My head is spinning. This is going to take a while to fix.

'Hey, what's my nude?
'I misspoke. Apologies. Sorry, Science.
'You're not being sincere.'
'Oh, here it comes.

Alina sent me a picture. That's it, that's it. This bipedal protein assembly.
We showed the image to Ugin and got to the bottom of it.

Who is this android? This is the guy who's rubbing shoulders with you.

He groans and looks at my phone. He smells like booze. I'm gonna throw you in the washing machine.
Then he starts laughing.

'You thought he was my boyfriend? That's hilarious!
'Then what is it? A mannequin?
'I'm her boyfriend!

The person who pointed a finger was a girl who rubbed shoulders with a man. He said this not to Ugin, but to the girl in a bathing suit who was on the other side of him. In other words, the man has Ugin and another person by his side. I'm glad I'm not a judge. I would have been in the electric chair for sure.



I was just shoulder to shoulder. That's all.
'Ho. In the groove. Ho.'
'Brother, you look like a killer.
'Now I can play the hero of cannibalism. At least I'm glad she's okay.
'Safe' means ...... well, it's nothing special. I might have a boyfriend someday.
What? Big brother, I'm going crazy right now.
But I think I'll wait until I'm close to Alaska. I want to decide how to live my life in my 20s, so I guess I'll be alone until then.
Don't use the word 'Alaska' so easily. And don't use the word "Alaska" so easily. You'll be killed within a week.
'If that happens, I'll ask my brother to protect me.
'I'll take care of it. When I get serious, there'll be tomato juice all over the place.
'It's weirdly kind of you not to call it a sea of blood.