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I arrive in front of my grandpa's room and take a deep breath.
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Normally, I can easily open such a door, but today I am nervous. I can feel my heart beating faster.
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Don't worry, I'm sure there is no bad news. Because things are going so well.
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You pull yourself together and knock on the door.
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"What?"
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I hear grandpa's voice. That's enough to put my mind at ease.
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"It's Jill."
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"Jill. What are you doing here all morning?"
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He opens the door for me.
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He is his usual kind and gentle self. I look into his left eye. These golden eyes remind me of Alicia.
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"I wanted to ask you a few questions," he says.
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Well, come inside.
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I can't hide my expression very well in front of him. He must have noticed right away that I was giving off a dark vibe.
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The room was clean and tidy, and there were many papers lined up on the desk.
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It was impossible to lose such a talented person.
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"What happened?"
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Grandpa sat down in his chair and asked me. I like his calm tone.
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He hesitates for a moment and then opens his mouth.
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"Are you sick, Jicchan?"
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I could hear his voice tremble a little. Jicchan looks a little troubled by my question.
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This reaction does not bode well. I knew it intuitively.
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There was a pleasant cool breeze coming in through the window.
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"Answer honestly."
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I speak again to Jichan, who says nothing.
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"Oh, he's sick. ...... was that Jill in the hallway yesterday?"
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"Are you going to ...... die?"
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"No, I'm not going to die yet. But one day you will. We all have to die. This is an irreversible truth.
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I don't want to die."
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I can't help but cry. I decided not to cry after Alicia's departure. .......
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But I can't seem to stop myself from crying.
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"Jill, I'm still alive and well. I won't die for a while."
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"Really?"
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Grandpa nodded with a smile.
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But I knew. But I knew it was just a gentle lie to reassure me.
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"I have a big job to do, to rebuild this country. I have a big job to do, ...... but if I finish it all, will you let me take a break then?"
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I could not nod at his words. I don't want to leave a trace of his death in my mind.
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...... but if it is his destiny, I have no choice but to follow him. I have no say in the matter.
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I understand."
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I answered with tears in my eyes.
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Grandpa said, "Thank you," and patted my head gently.
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My heart breaks at the thought that one day I will no longer be stroked by his big, burly hands.
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Still, I have to look forward now. As long as grandpa is alive, I will do my best.
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