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I have tried hundreds of ways to fuse them together to make the same thing as Maddie.
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If any one of the three is too little or too much, it will fail. Finding the perfect blend was a difficult task.
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I did my best to find that balance. I had to eat and sleep to be able to think straight, so I took breaks and spent all the rest of my time working on Maddie.
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Henri told me that it would be better for my health if I went outside to relax, but I didn't have time for that. Sleep and food were the only things that kept me going.
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Well, I was still doing research while eating.
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Generally, the color of the samples turned out to be beautiful, but soon turned black and failed.
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But strangely enough, the word "failure" never crossed my mind. I was confident that I could succeed.
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I would not fail if I could save my grandpa.
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I wrote down the recipe on a piece of paper and tore it up. Then one day, Duke came to see me.
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"How are you doing?"
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After just a short absence, Duke's mood seemed a little more mature again.
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I put a lot of pressure on myself to lie so that I can't run away anymore.
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"I think I'm almost done."
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"...... don't push yourself again."
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Duke's big hand caresses my head.
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I'm sure he knows I'm not making any progress on my Maddie research. But he doesn't say anything. Once again, I feel Duke's kindness.
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Thank you. ...... what's up today?"
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I ask him, and he gently removes his hand from my head and looks at me with serious eyes.
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"I think I'll go see Alicia."
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My thoughts stop at those words. Duke adds a few more words.
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"You coming too, Jill?"
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...... Can I meet Alicia?
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My heart was filled with joy, but it soon became anxious.
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What would I be proud of if I met Alicia now? After all, I had accomplished nothing in her absence.
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It was Duke who broke the spell of Cather Liz's charm and liberated the poor village.
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The only thing I am proud of now is that I may be able to make a cure for spotted fever. But I'm not there yet.
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I can't go to see Alicia like this.
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I have to make up my mind. I have to decide what my priorities are. Alicia has always taught me that.
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"I'm ...... going to stay."
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His voice didn't tremble.
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Duke replies quietly, "Okay.
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He must have asked Mel and Albert and the others to take care of the school for him. I can now devote myself to Maddie's research with peace of mind.
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"See you later. Say bye to Alicia for me.
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I say this and fall on my face. For some reason, I couldn't look Duke straight in the face right now. He patted me gently on the head and left.
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Duke's footsteps are moving away from me.
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I manage to sort out my jumbled emotions.
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I really wanted to see Alicia. If grandpa hadn't been suffering from the spotted disease, I would have run out right now.
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I manage to control my emotions with my rational mind.
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...... is no time for tears. I have to make medicine. I have to prove that I made the right decision.
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Wiping away the tears that were about to spill, I picked up the three plants again and began to mix them.
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