2-01.Incompetent wiping the ass




 Pindos.
 The most populous and most prosperous city in the territory of the Cano family.

 Hence, the mansion, which is the home of the Cano family, is located here.
 Since they are a venerable noble family, the mansion is quite magnificent.

 I was in an even more splendid room of the splendid mansion, a room that looks like a simplified version of the audience room of the royal palace.

 I was sitting in a fine chair with a dozen men standing across from me.
 They are the Cano family vassals.

 In the midst of the vassals is Mimis.
 All of them, including Mimis, are looking at me with a difficult look on their faces.

I'm sure you know that I am the head of the Cano family from today. Nice to meet you.

 A buzz.

 I tried a frank greeting, but I got a very sullen voice and expression from the retainer group.

''You must stop doing that sort of thing, brother father.

 The one who stepped forward and spoke to me, holding back the buzz, was Sora.

 She was my sister not long ago, and now she is my adopted daughter, a woman(human) with a strange relationship.

'Oto-usama sounding, don't call me by that strange name, sister.
'He was my brother, but now he's my father, isn't that what you call him?
But that doesn't mean you can't stick it to me. Just keep it together, please.
Okay, I'll call you Hermes, as usual.

 The sister nodded.
 Then, with a swoosh, she pulled back against the wall.

'Sis, aren't you going to say anything?'
I am the daughter of Hermes, and I'm not in a position to speak here.
Uh....

 Isn't that unfair? Isn't that kind of usage unfair?

With all due respect, sir.

 I wondered if she was endorsing her sister's reply, but I hadn't shut up until now because I'd been so quiet - or bothered.
 Mimis stepped forward and gave me a challenging look.

'I have a job for you, my lord, that needs to be done as soon as possible.
It's a pain in the ass... what?
The family is currently in debt.
Debt? How long?
About 50,000 pieces of gold.
Why did you have to spend so much money?

 I furrowed my brow.
 Fifty thousand gold coins is more than the annual tax revenue that comes up from the Cano family's territory.

'Have you ever heard of the Trikala Mine?
Oh, you're from Trikara Steel, where they say it never rusts. The Cano family has, well, a hammer.
The Trikala mine has been on the verge of production for several years now. Milos' predecessors realized that the reserves were not yet exhausted, so they raised funds from merchants to further develop the mine.
So that's what the loan is for.
The merchants want it back. Ostensibly, he's afraid that Milos will take it on himself and overthrow him.
Yeah.

 That's what you've been doing, brother Milos.

'So?'
....

 Mimis gave me an even more condescending look, "You can't even understand that?
 Eventually, her tone of voice turned furious.

I can't let them take the Trikala Mine now. You will have to negotiate with the merchants.

 That's almost a threat, isn't it?

 Yeah? On second thought, isn't this rather convenient?
 I looked at my sister.

 My adopted daughter, my sister, who is now my adopted daughter.
 Neither she nor I have any children, or rather, we are the only two direct descendants of the Cano family anymore.

 I've seen more vassals.
 If I can lead them to it, they can carry her and try to get me down, and it will lead to a family feud, right?

 Carrying a child and defeating a parent, the golden pattern of family turmoil.

 

I don't know, you do it.
What did you say?
That's an order.
I assure you, the merchants are putting a lot of pressure on us. We will not get anywhere until our master is present.
Are you saying you won't?
It's not enough to be anyone but the master.
So you're fired.
...What?

 Mimis became very surprised and the other vassals buzzed again.

'He's incompetent and can't do anything except carry the master out, so we're firing him.
Oh, wait a minute. That's a lot to take in.
Yeah? What, the head of the family can't fire a single vassal?
No, I don't mean that.

 Mimis panicked, her gaze wandering, and as a result, she met her sister's eyes.

 She sighed and stepped forward.

'Hermes,'
What's up, sis?
'Mimis has served the Cano family for many years. Isn't firing her out of the blue a bit much?
Hmm.

 I pretended to be distressed.
 It was expedient for his sister to come out.

 A convenient situation that would make this guy feel indebted to his sister, and there was no reason not to take advantage of it.

'Well then, house arrest, stay home for a week or so and reflect on it.
....

 Mimis was still unhappy, but her sister nodded slightly.

'Thankfully happy.'

 And then he briskly left the room.

 Well, the rest of the vassals are giving me the benefit of the doubt.
 Let's do this kind of thing again.

 If we do it well, the vassals are going to earn their hate as they carry their sister.

 I look around to see if I can find something else to do to earn the hate.
 Then I see something piled up across the room, near the entrance.

'What's that?'
It's the ore from the Trikala mine.

 My sister answered for me.
 Okay, so you blame me, and you brought it to me for the material to move?

 I get up from my chair and go to the ore.

 The vassals cleared the way with wary eyes, since I had just done something tyrannical just before.

 They stand in front of a pile of ores and take one of them in their hands.

''........a**h*le.''

 I was taken aback.
 I was dumbfounded, terribly dumbfounded.

 I picked up another piece of ore.

'A douchebag,'

 Same swearing again.

'What's the matter, Hermes?'

 My sister approaches and asks me.
 She turns around and sees the vassals beyond her sister.
 The vassals are in a distant mode of watching the outcome.

 That's more and more.

'Are you all a**h*les?'

 This led to the words, "What is the matter with you, Hermes?

'What in the world is wrong with you, Hermes? You're a lot more emotional than you were before, don't you think?
Here.

 I put two or three ores in my palm and crushed them with both hands.
 Not with arm strength, of course, but with magic.

 Rags spilled out of my palms, scraps of stone and metal that weren't even made into iron.
 After a while, I open my hand.

 There--.

Is this........silver?
Yeah, it's silver.
Is there silver in here?
A lot.

 The vassals are buzzing.
 It's a buzz that's almost a surprise.

'I can see it in your hand, the only way you've tried to make Trikara steel anyway, right? So you don't even realize that there's a lot of silver in there. You're all incompetent.
...I see.

 My sister picked up one of the ores and observed it seriously, then returned it to the pile of ore.

'I can't tell by looking at it,'

 And then, after preamble, to the vassals.

'Find out if there's any silver in there right now.
Ha, ha!

 Everyone who had been ordered jumped out of the room in a hurry.

 Immediately, me and my sister and I were the only ones left in the room.

That's great.
What?
It's amazing how you can spot a lot of silver in one second.
Oh....

 I did it and I did it....

 I was so angry that they were so incompetent that I just did it.

I knew I wasn't crazy. I always thought that Hermes could do great things when he was serious.
I didn't mean it.

 I was a little flustered and I ran those words out of my mouth.

 I didn't really mean it, but the way I said it.

'Yeah, I know,'

 My sister's smile got me deeper and deeper.
 Yes, it was the kind of smile that said.