Hey, you're going to help me with my research.

This is the story of a week of nightmares that began with one word.




----Kouki Arakawa Viewpoint

Hey, you're going to help me with my research.

　Saito-kun, who was devouring a ten-don in the school cafeteria, said that to me and Alice. To be honest, I thought it was a hassle, but I couldn't say that I helped Alice and Saito didn't help. Alice herself is quite enthusiastic about it, probably because she helped me, so I decided to ask her what she's going to do, and that's what I'm going to do.

"Well, I want to make a simple work robot with AI.

　Hmm, a work robot... Since it's Saito-kun, he's probably going to use a military-type power suit or something, so I asked him.

I asked Saito, "What type of shape should it be?　Humanoid or tank?

No, it's a cockroach.

　Wait, what did you say?　I thought I heard a few words I didn't want to hear, but I probably misheard them. Alice also stops with a drawn-out face as she sips her tea, I ask her again.

'What did you say?'

So it's a cockroach.

　I don't want you to smile at me like that. Why are you a cockroach in the first place!　That's where the tanks and other impossible things are, and I'm the one who's always saying, 'Mom!　It's the part where you ask 'please'. Why are you wasting your time today on a creature that's full of reality? See, Alice is already looking a little teary-eyed.

"It's a work robot, which I think is reasonable...

　This isn't about being rational or anything.　Why do I have to use such a creepy creature as a model? When I said this, Saito-kun, who is usually a quiet man, snapped at me.

''Huh?　Is that disgusting?　What's the matter with you, creepy!　Cockroaches are amazing creatures; perfect shapes that have barely changed in 300 million years, the ability to survive and adapt to any environment. And they're also one of the most agile of all insects, you know?　Some species can not only glide but also fly, and they can be active for more than 50 days without even taking water. They can learn fast, and if you put poisonous food in the same place, they won't eat it, and they'll develop tolerance to the effects of drugs very quickly. It's perfect!　It's truly the ultimate creature. Plus......

　With Saito-kun's eyes fixed on the ground as he speaks passionately, Alice comes over to talk to me while pulling my clothes on the side.

''What's wrong with you, Saito-kun?''

　No, I don't know if you'd ask me that. It's true that my first impression was that he was a strange person, but lately I've thought that was a misunderstanding. But looking at this situation, he must have been a strange person after all....... Insulting the cockroach must have hurt something inside Saito-kun.　I told Alice that, and she nodded in agreement.

'Are you two listening?　I'm in a good place right now.

　We've been talking about the wonders of cockroaches and their biology for more than five minutes and it's still not enough.... I mean, I think the nickname should be 'Cockroach' now, Saito-kun. I get it already, the shape is fine as a cockroach, but as for the samples, me and Alice will never go out and catch them. With that said.

Yeah, it's okay. I'll 'keep' it.

　Isn't it obvious?　Saito-kun said with a look on his face as if to say. Nothing is okay and Alice is already half crying.

''Come with me after school today, I'll choose which kind to model at my house.

　Saito-kun smiled and invited me to join him. I could only nod, too afraid to say I didn't want to because I was uncomfortable.





rustling.......... Kata!　Crunching.....

　The first thing that caught my eye as I entered Saito's room was the breeding case that covered the entire wall, and the indescribable sound. Alice didn't come in from the entrance of the room, but was watching him.

''How many animals are in here?

There are eight species now, about 80 in all.

　When I asked, Saito-kun answered happily. Then he pulls them out of their cases one by one and explains to me what they are. I couldn't tell them apart, but he seemed to have given each species a name. I didn't want to look at it too much, so I said it was fine to just call him that.

I said, "Yes, I thought so too. I think the most popular cockroach is 'Habanero'.

　Saito, you know what to do!　And then he encourages my opinion. Hey Alice, stop looking at me like that, even me, like 'I like cockroaches! I don't like these creatures!





　The next day, we started working on the robot in Saito's lab, but on the first day, the German cockroach Angel-tan, which we had brought in as a sample, escaped from the robot and flew into Alice's face, and we almost lost our precious sample. After that, because we were so concerned about the appearance of the robot, it was not the cockroach-shaped work robot we had originally planned, but a real cockroach of one meter in length.
　The first time we moved the real thing, the level of realism was such that I was cowed, Alice ran away from the lab as fast as she could, and Saito did the same thing to me. And now we were running into a problem.

'What do we do about the AI setup Arakawa-kun's mom gave us?'

　Saito looked at the program screen with a troubled expression on his face. Hmm, since this is such a realistic robot, I'd like to make the content itself more realistic as well.... When I said that, all three of them typed in what they wanted on the screen. And finally, Saito finishes by entering the "Slippery Slope" deactivation program, just in case something goes wrong.







----Chabane, the work robot, point of view


　The watashi is a robot created by the masters. The content of what was programmed into him in order of priority

One, stay away from one of the masters, Lady Alice. Also, he will not attack humans.
2、Clean the academy. If you decide to do something else that is useful to humans, do it.
3、Do not multiply yourself more than necessary.
4、Avoid being seen by others.
5. Return to the laboratory regularly.

　These are the five items. The first thing I did was to take up residence in the sewers underneath the academy. Then, I will focus on getting more friends to clean up the large school. The number of companions is increased while collecting the necessary parts from the disposal site, and when the number exceeds 400, they all jump out of the manhole at night and start cleaning the academy. On the way, he realized that the cleaning efficiency was not good enough as it is now, so he evolved himself.
　After living like that for a while, one day while collecting the trash, he encountered someone other than the master!　The human looked at me and then left as if nothing had happened, but wasn't he surprised?　However, it's time for me to run out of things to clean the academy.
　That's right, let's make that flower bed Master Kunugi-sama mentioned before. Apparently, people feel more at ease when they see flowers.... I decided to work hard to collect the parts to make more flowerbeds.








----A Viewpoint by Kaoru Yamamoto, the Dean of the school


This place is clean too...

　Recently, I was pleased to see that every inch of the school has been cleaned up. I always nag my students about the importance of cleaning, but I never get a good response. However, they may have finally noticed that there is not a single piece of dust in any of the places in the school. Furthermore, when I came to the back of the research tower, where there is usually a lot of littering, I saw something that stopped me in my tracks.


In front of me, there was a cockroach walking on two legs with a garbage bag around its neck.


　A cockroach of about one meter in length was walking and stuffing garbage into the bag. I must have been tired to see that thing. That day I slept soundly and decided to get rid of my daily fatigue. The next day, when I went to work, I saw impossible things again.


I found flowers and planters made from recycled garbage all over the school.


　They were politely placed so as not to be obnoxious, and the institute looked like a scene in a movie. Had someone called a contractor?　I checked and no one said they had done anything like that. The staff meeting eventually concluded that it was a student prank, but I wondered if the students could have gone as far as to cover the outside wall of the clock tower in the center of the building.　As I was thinking about this, I looked out the window and saw the usual bipedal cockroach walking around holding a planter.




　I must still be tired....