Lamp Eye, the "Hellfire Witch" is one of the mermaids who work at our farm.
She is one of the six witches who are reputed to be the most outstanding female potion user among mermaids, and she used to be a soldier in the mermaid's castle.
Because of such a background, her loyalty to Platy, the mermaid princess, is absolute. It's almost as if her enemies are her enemies.
After all, because of her previous job as a soldier, she is unusually specialized in fighting among mermaids, and often raids the dungeons alongside Okubo and the others.
This is her story in this article.
* * * *
Yes, that's me.
I'll take the story from here on out.
I've been in the air for a while now because I haven't been able to keep up with the political discussion between Plati, the Demon King, and the Mermaid's guests.
And Mr. Hendler, Prince Arowana's agent, right? The drawing room is now in an uproar as the guests greet the
'Stand down, Master Prati! I'll not have you anywhere near this rude bastard!
As for you! Having a violent soldier like you in the vicinity of Princess Platy is the last thing on my mind! What are the Kingsguard thinking!
Mr. Hendler and Lamp-Eye cursed each other and couldn't get it together.
What is this?
You two know each other?
Prathi, who is sitting on the top seat with a sour look on her face, seems to have some idea of what's going on.
I mean, I can't solve the mystery except for her, who is the only person here right now who is involved.
'Hasn't your husband ever heard of it? How did Lamp Eye get here?
Basically, the mermaids who have come to work on our farm are usually prisoners of the mermaid kingdom.
They've come to stay with us as part of a plea bargain, in exchange for exile on our farm.
Lamprey is no exception, and before she came to us, she was also a prisoner in the Mermaid Kingdom.
The reason for her capture................................was because of a violent incident, I believe.
They say she beat up a nobleman in front of the king or something.
What do you mean...?
The nobleman they say Lampwick beat up in front of the king...
"...that would explain the situation.
So, Mr. Hendler is an aristocrat?
'He's a debater in the field, but he's supposed to be well-born. That's why my brother and I are good friends. As I recall, he was born into a warrior family, but he didn't want to join the army, so he ran away from home or something...? Didn't you do that or...?
That's unreliable information.
In the meantime, the bickering between Hendler and Lamprey is getting more heated.
Lady Platy! Permission to burn this scoundrel! This wicked thing must be planning to do something terrible!
I'll do the same thing! Aren't you doing a stint in a trench cell? You're an escaped convict? I'll have to call the authorities and have them arrest you!
Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait...!
Calm down, both of you!
I don't need a blood feud on my farm anyway!
Well, I think we're getting somewhere.
'What do you mean?' said Prathi, with a knowing look.
'What do you mean, Prati?'
It was my brother who sent Hendler, wasn't it? He has this kind of way of getting through to me. He thinks he's being kind, but he's too stuffy...
"Lamprey is one of the more decent mermaid prisoners that were sent to us. He is an elite member of the Kingsguard. In fact, before he was imprisoned, he was sometimes called the 'Sixth Witch's Only Sense'.
The only disgraceful thing about her being a prisoner was the violence in the king's presence.
'Hendler is the victim of that, isn't he? If he works on that, he might be able to wipe away the only stain on the lamp eye. That's why your brother sent him in.
It sounds like something Prince Arowana might come up with.
"If Lump-Eye apologizes and Hendler accepts," he said, "all his past sins will be behind him. "If Lamprey apologizes and Hendler accepts, his past sins will be behind him, and he'll be free of all charges. There may be a way for you to return to the Mermaid Palace Kingsguard.
What do you think?
'What do you mean?' asked Prathi to Lamprey.
'Can't you apologize again to Mr. Hendler here?
I'm afraid not.
He answered immediately.
'First of all, I have no desire to return to the Kingsguard. It is my supreme pleasure to serve you here in the service of Lord Prati. .... moreover!
It's getting hotter and hotter as he talks.
''I would never bow to such a rude person! What this man said in the presence of the king! I can recite it without missing a single word!
''Anyway, Princess Plati is a pharmacy nerd who doesn't know any civility, so there's no way she'll be able to marry anywhere.
"...is that right? How can you let this happen? This insult to royalty cannot be tolerated by those of us who are loyal to them!
Well..., I guess you're right, huh?
Prathi himself says.
At the time of this debacle, Prathi had already run away from home and didn't know all the details.
'How on earth did you come up with this statement? Hendler?
It is with great pains that I explain to the princess herself, but...
Hendler is in awe, as expected.
''It all started with Princess Prati's marriage ceremony. Whether to marry into the demon race or the human race...
''In that debate, I was a so-called neutral party. The human race, the demon race, no matter which side I married into, the situation could only get worse. I shouldn't marry into either...
That's an extremely valid argument in itself.
When I spoke directly to His Majesty the Mermaid King to make my point, I lost my nerve and slipped up. She happened to be in the audience security area and overheard me.
And it was raining blood.
'Look at them! You are the one who needs to apologize! You must get down on your knees to your insulted counterpart, Princess Prati, for your past mistakes!
No, I can't do that.
I am an orator. A debater must do justice to his own words, even if they are gibberish. If I were to correct and retract each and every one of them, my entire word would eventually lose its power!
I've always found the debaters to be very annoying.
"Therefore, I will not take back any of my words. I will not take back any of my words, even if I get beaten to death for them! Because when you lose your arrogance, you cease to be a debater!
'Well said! Then I'll shut your rude mouth and you'll never speak again!
Oh, you call for violence again?
It's not violence. This is not violence, but the Hammer of Justice. I will punish those who disrespect royalty on your behalf!
Very well. I was caught off guard and could not do much about it. But if I'm up against it, I'll be able to take my chances with a woman. And I'll prove it!
Something like that.
* * * *
Hendler vs. Lamp Eye.
For some reason, that's what happened.
The two are already outside the mansion, exchanging contradictions with each other.
Moreover, Hendler is surprisingly strong.
He avoided the Lamp Eye's special explosive magic pills and accurately hit the contraption.
''Even though you're a debater, you were born in a noble family from a warrior's family, so it seems you've practiced martial arts in one way or another.
"I just heard at a glance that my brother also participated in the Muso swimming tournament he won the other day, and he made it to the final tournament. I heard that he lost in the first round when he had a bout with the master of the sunfish.
I don't know, but isn't that pretty awesome?
I hope they recognize each other's abilities in battle and reconcile, because Lamp Eye is a simple soldier, too.
So you authorized this duel?
'I want the kids who work for us to be sunny and free if possible, so I want to take that chance with a bang. It would be nice if Puffa could marry her brother, and Lamprey would also take this opportunity...''
If only I could unwind the coils with Hendler and get the charges expunged...?
I wonder if it will work....
The two of them hate each other like dogs and monkeys.
In a shonen manga type of development, something like "Let's tie up, then we're buddies" was supposed to happen.
* * * *
What the hell happened?
Did I miss something?
When I woke up, things were happening in a way I never thought possible.
"Platy...! What happened? What made you decide to propose...?
I don't know, I didn't see any moves. I don't know. I didn't see any moves. When in the world did we get to be in such a relationship!
This is the sensation of blowing time away.
It's not a small thing, like "I just took my eyes off you for a second...".
Lamprey and Hendler held each other's hands and were immersed in their world.
.........Is it right to say that this is all settled?
I don't even feel that there was a commotion, though.
* * * *
He proposed to her and she agreed, but not before he actually got registered.
My lifelong mission is to protect Princess Plati. I will not give up my lifelong mission to protect Princess Prati.
No matter what happens, he will never leave our farm as long as Prathi is there.
'I asked her to marry me with all the force I could muster, but I am not allowed to take a wife as a guest. I am sorry for her if I don't at least do some good.
He said as they held each other's hands tightly together.
For the first time, I felt annoyed with these two men.
For a while, they're going to enjoy a form of commuter marriage from Hendler, while bringing in supplies from the mermaid country on behalf of Prince Arowana.
His new wife is just the "Hellfire Witch".